Striking Women
Arabic original
وَاللاَّتِي تَخَافُونَ نُشُوزَهُنَّ فَعِظُوهُنَّ وَاهْجُرُوهُنَّ فِي الْمَضَاجِعِ وَاضْرِبُوهُنَّ فَإِنْ أَطَعْنَكُمْ فَلاَ تَبْغُواْ عَلَيْهِنَّ سَبِيلاً إِنَّ اللّهَ كَانَ عَلِيّاً كَبِيراً} [النساء: 34].
Translation
And those whose ill conduct you fear, then advise them and abandon them in their beds, and strike them. But if they obey you, then do not seek a way against them. Indeed, Allah is ever Exalted and Grand. [An-Nisa: 34]
Explanation
Tafsir Ibn Kathir
And women whose rebellion against their husbands you fear. Rebellion is rising; so the rebellious woman is the one who rises against her husband, abandons his command, turns away from him, and hates him. Whenever signs of rebellion appear from her, then advise her and warn her of Allah's punishment for disobeying Him, for Allah has made the husband's right upon her obligatory and his obedience binding upon her, and has forbidden her from disobeying him because of the favour and generosity He has granted him over her...
(And abandon them in the beds) Ali ibn Abi Talhah reported from Ibn Abbas: Abandonment means not having sexual intercourse with her, but sharing her bed and turning his back to her...
(And strike them) That is, if they do not refrain from defiance through advice or abandonment, then you may strike them with a strike that causes no lasting harm...
In the Arabic language...
The conjunction 'waw' denotes a collective action and does not itself indicate order or progression, unlike 'fa' which denotes order and sequence, or 'thumma' which denotes order with delay...
Contemporary psychology holds that the use of any form of striking: Fails at long-term change—it may change behaviour momentarily due to fear, but does not create conviction. Generates resentment—it destroys feelings of affection, which are the fundamental fuel for the continuation of any human relationship.